So it was Yuki's birthday party and the kids were playing 'Ghost in the graveyard' which is just like a night game, so the kids were all over the place.
While they were out playing I'd decided to relax a little and started reading my book. We'd cleaned up after the dinner mess and had opened presents. I figured we'd do cake later on when Yuki wanted to.
I was upstairs reading my book and Yuki came running into the room and said "Mum, Dad fell off the ladder. He's either playing a joke on us, or he really fell of the ladder, you better come quick and check on him"
I knew Dru wasn't the joking type, especially to joke about being hurt in front of a bunch of children. That's not his style at all.
So I quickly ran out to the front of the shop, where he'd fallen.
I guess he must've been like me, and figured the kids were busy and he'd work on the shop for a little while and get the front siding done.
He had the ladder as an A frame up close to the shop and had his headlamp on cause it was starting to get a little darker with his tool belt on and his hammer.
We're not sure what happened, as I wasn't there, no one saw, and Dru doesn't remember, but we figured it went something like this............well let's put it out there first, however, that Dru has never had an accident doing construction. This is and hopefully will stay, his first. So I never worry about him you know. He's also so safe and so sure footed, that it's never been a problem. If he's super high he'll wear a harness and make sure he's locked in. I guess with him just being around 12 feet up he figured it'd be ok and it wasn't.
Picture taken AFTER the fall to recreate the scene.
This is the indentation that was left in the gravel after Dru had fallen. Luckily it was on the gravel and not on the concrete with no give.
The ladder was on the gravel, which isn't the most stable, and I guess something happened and it kicked out, as when I ran out there the ladder had fallen out towards the street.
He had small abrasions on his right elbow and upper bum area and so we figured he knew he was going to fall and so tried to land on his feet and came in hot landing feet, butt, elbow then slamming his head. Or he could've also his his head on the shop wall on the way down as well maybe? We're not sure, but that's the conclusion we've come to.
Yuki's little friend was the first to 'see' and hear it happen and she screamed. She quickly ran to tell Yuki and then proceeded to cry for the next hour as well as her other friend Susie. Masaru's friend, Kaleb was really upset as well. So the kids tried to comfort them.
Yuki said when she ran to Dad she found him on the ground with his head facing in towards the shop wall and siding over his face. When she pulled the siding off of his face his eyes were rolled back, so she was scared.
I came to Dru and he was partially coherent. He looked at me and was responding to me, but no one was 'home' so to speak. I'm glad he was looking at me though and doing as I asked him.
I then looked over his body to see if he had anything broken or bleeding and did a quick assessment of his body.
Everything looked good. All of the children were around watching, and I felt like telling them to get lost, but I knew they needed to know that things were going to be alright, so I remained calm and allowed the kids to stay where they were and watch it play out.
After I realized there was nothing broken I told Masaru to grab me a pillow so I could slip it under his head and let him have something more comfortable underneath his head to lay on.
Masaru grabbed it for me quick smart and I shoved it under his head, lightly and kept him focused on me and talking.
By the time I'd finished that, our neighbour, Jessica, had run over and her brother Ben as well. Ben happened to be in town just on a quick trip for the weekend to visit his mother. He hadn't seen her since May and had chosen this weekend to fly up from CA for a quick visit and stayed with Jessica. Ben is a doctor. So then Ben took over. He assessed Dru and then said we were going to the hospital immediately. Once he'd assessed that Dru was ok for his head to be moved, him and Masaru picked him up and got him into the van and drove us to the nearest hospital.
I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I wasn't going to take Dru to the hospital. It costs so much money and we're on a pretty tight budget with paying back the shop, I just didn't want more debt on my mind. So I figured he must be ok and was going to just take him to our bedroom.
Ben basically ordered me to take him to the hospital and I obeyed. I almost put up an argument, but then didn't.
Jessica took care of all of the children that were at the house and then Caleb's mum, Trisha texted straight away and then came over and helped out.
When I had a second an hour later, I texted all the parents and told them the sleepover was off and they needed to come and pick up their children and explained why.
So now the whole world knew hahahahaha
Yuki was pretty upset that her party was canceled but I told her to get serious and hung up on her.
So we went into St Luke's hospital and got Dru a wheelchair and got him straight into the ER. It's the first time we've ever gotten straight in without delay.
They put a neck brace on him and started taking x-rays of his body to make sure nothing was broken, as well as cat scans on his brain to see how his brain was doing.
He was pretty out of it to begin with but then started 'waking up' a little and he was quite distressed and agitated. I've never seen a projectile vomit quite like the one he did all over the floor and bed of this hospital.
Then a man came in and slowly cleaned it up. It was amazing as I can't clean up my own kids spew, let alone a total strangers. He has a gift. That was the first of many times of throw up. I'd say out of the 10 or so times he threw up maybe 2 were in the little baggie you see him holding. He refused to throw up in the bags and would push people out of the way to throw up on the floor. Very unlike him, as he's pretty clean and neat.
Ben went with them to look at the ct scan and read what it said.
He came back with bad news. He said it looked as it Dru did have a brain bleed and so that'd mean they'd be keeping him overnight in the hospital and also changing hospitals to get him to the best trauma people in the city.
Ben then proceeded to give Dru a blessing.
In the blessing Ben blessed Dru's body to immediately start healing itself and for a full recovery. It was and is the only blessing that Dru received and it was a great one. Talk about right place at the right time for us with Ben.
Coincidence? I don't believe so. I believe Dru was being watched out for and I acknowledge all of the miracles that occured around his fall and beyond.
He could've had anything and everything broken and nothing was. His brain injury could've killed him and it didn't.
So they measured the brain bleed and it was .8cms just behind his right eye. This is the frontal lobe and your emotions.
This is why Dru was acting so opposite to himself. His frontal lobe had been shaken up and wasn't working properly due to the wound.
He also had a couple of outward bruises on the back of his brain, probably caused by the whiplash. The outside ones aren't as bad as the bruising absorbs and slowly heals itself.
This internal bleed, however, is pretty bad. It means that the brain liquifies and absorbs this wound and it takes that part of the brain and a hole is left there instead. So you lose a part of your brain forever. Your brain then tried to fire around the hole and figure out how to manage without that part of it anymore.
The doctors told me it's so small that he 'should' be just fine.
So they placed him in an ambulance and let me ride with him and we went to the other hospital that deals with this kind of trauma.
Ben got in our van and drove to Jessica where she had collected a few things for me since I was going to be sleeping over in the hospital for the night. They eventually met me in the waiting room later on with my stuff. Ben asked if we wanted him to stay but I told him to go home and thanks for everything.
They took Dru into a big room and cut up his favourite mtb shirt that you saw him wearing in that first picture. Afterwards he was really upset as they could've just taken it off of him normally since his spine was fine.
We sent it over to his sister Brooke the other day, to see if she could 'frankenstein' it together, which I think would be pretty cool.
They let me stand in the corner of this massive room as they worked with him. He wasn't happy and wasn't doing as he was told. He hated the neck brace they had him in and was complaining about that. He was pushing the male nurses around and throwing up all over the place.
They got him in for another scan I think then brought him to a smaller room in the ER area.
He wasn't doing well. Every time he lay down he'd throw up as he'd get dizzy, but he didn't wanna throw up in the baggie provided. He always needed someone holding him or he would've gotten out of the bed.
He kept trying to take his IV's out of his arms and wouldn't wear his oxygen. They kept having to pull his hand back and tell him no.
He told a nurse to stop yelling at him as well. It was sad, scary and funny all at the same time.
I was thinking to myself, 'Is this the new Dru? A total jerk?'
They didn't want to send him up to the ward until they'd found someone who could sit with him the while time to make sure he didn't take all of his stuff out of him.
They asked me to help, that maybe he'd keep things in if I was the one that told him to keep it in. His oxygen was getting low and he refused to keep it in his nose cause it was annoying him.
So I gave it a go. The nurse said that they're all strangers to him and if maybe someone he trusted told him to do it, he would.
So I said "Dru, you gotta keep this oxygen in babe" he's like "But I don't like it" "Yeah but it's helping you breath" "But it's annoying me and I can't breathe properly with it on" "I know, but you need to keep it on ok? For me." "ok"
Then he'd keep it on until he needed to throw up and then it'd be off again.
I also had to help him with keeping his IV's in his arm. About every 5 mins he was trying to pull them out.
"Dru you can't take those out" "why not" "Because that's how they're getting meds into you" "But they really hurt and I don't like them" "I know, but I need you to stop touching them" "Ok"
Then put this on repeat every 5 mins.
They kept him up and babysat him for about 6 hours until they took the next headscan. Then after that they finally sedated him and he drifted off to sleep.
They took us up to the ward and we both slept until around 10:30am the next morning.
We were so tired.
It'd happened around 9pm and we'd finally gotten to sleep at around 5am.
Meanwhile........... Masaru wanted to stay at home in his own bed for the night and the rest stayed over at Jessica's house for the night.
In the morning, Yuki and Masaru went for a mtb ride with their team, while Jessica took the younger two kids to a car show where they had a ton of fun.
Then I told Jessica to let Takeshi go home and mow the lawns for us, so she did, and Emiko just hung out with them.
Masaru and Yuki had come back from their mtb ride then Yuki hung out with a friend and Masaru chilled.
They were supposed to be doing their chores first then chilling. I dunno if that happened. I'd like to think so.
It was nice to have people helping us out.
The Simon's, the night of, stayed with Jessica until every child was picked up, which was a huge help and a relief to me.
Apparently they cut the cake and loved that and sang to Yuki. So that's good.
When I woke up I went over to Dru to see how he was. He looked at me and said "What happened?"
I said "You fell off a ladder" "Well that can't be good" "Nope, it wasn't good" Then proceeded to tell him about his brain, what had happened and the night.
He also asked if anyone knew. I told him everyone knew because he fell infront of about 20 people. He didn't like that.
I also had put it up on instagram. I figured if half of our neighbourhood knew, I needed to let his family know and instagram was the best way.
They'd brought him in food, which was a good sign. They'd seen that his bleed had stopped and wasn't growing bigger and so just wanted him to rest.
He only wanted to eat a pineapple sorbet. He said it was amazing. I was glad he was eating.
Then he went back to sleep for another couple of hours.
While he went back to sleep, I started the long procession of answering texts and phone calls to all of our friends, family and neighbours, who were concerned for Dru and wanted to know how things were.
It took a long time.
I talked to Puggs, Brooke, Delwyn and Sarah then texted a bunch of people. I told the same story a ton of times. It didn't bother me though. I like to talk. So that's a good thing.
The bishop of our ward and his counselor, somehow found us, and visited us. Dru was sleeping though and I happened to be outside of the room and we had a talk out there. They said they'd help out how they could and then left.
Those were our only visitors. I asked Dru if he wanted any and he said "No" which I knew would be the answer. No one else visited.
Then they delivered lunch and I realized how hungry I was but didn't want to steal all of Dru's food. He said he wasn't hungry but then proceeded to eat most of it. So I had what was left over and it tied me over.
We both felt about as good as we look in this picture.
We asked if we could go home and they told us as long as he'd passed a few check list things.
So a neurosurgeon came in and talked to us.
He was super weird and socially awkward but I'm sure he's good at brain stuff.
He told us Dru wouldn't need surgery and it'd be 2 weeks to a month of recovery.
Then a physical therapist came and made sure Dru could walk around and go up and down stairs and was ok.
Then they let us go.
But no doctor came and let us go, there were no instructions for care when we got home. It was the WORST dismissal I've ever been a part of and that hospital called Saint Als should be ashamed of themselves.
They dropped off a wheelchair in our room then nobody came back. So we figured we were on our own.
So I got Dru on the wheelchair, made him hold a bag full of his cut off shirt and my pillow and then we tried to slowly make out way out of the hospital.
It was horrible.
I didn't know where the car was and so I put Dru beside a park bench and told him not to move and then finally found my car. He looked homeless and if it wasn't so sad, it would've been funny.
I picked him up and we headed home.
I wanted him to have a bath but he was exhausted and just wanted to hop in bed.
So I made him change all of his clothes first before hopping into bed with all his hospital germs all over him.
He then slept for the rest of the day and night. I went in to check on him every now and then and the kids needed to see him for themselves, but other than that, he slept.
The next day I went to church to teach my lesson and left Dru for an hour.
He did fine and I did too.
The kids went to church on their own.
Then Puggs was talking to me and Ryan, Dru's brother.
His brother had been on a backpacking trip and called me the second he got into range on Sunday afternoon. His wife, Leslie, was keeping him informed via sat phone that his mate had up there, which is pretty cool.
Puggs asked me if he could come up, just for the day, and check and see if Dru was alright. I said sure and so he took his two youngest boys with him and hopped in his new truck and came to see Dru.
It was pretty awesome if you ask me. He stayed for a few hours and kept Dru company. It was the best I'd seen Dru in a couple of days.
Puggs really helped to lift Dru's spirits. What a guy right?
Late that night, after Puggs had left, Robby came over with some of his caramel popcorn and had a chat and visit with Dru.
It was great as well. Dru has great friends who love him.
Dru wasn't allowed to be on the phone, TV, computer, reading books or doing anything that required his brain to work at all. So I was also monitoring his phone as people were texting him. I was baffled but then figured maybe people don't know what the protocol of a brain injury means, so tried to keep up with texts on his phone as well.
He could talk on the phone, so I told his friends etc they could do that.
His highschool buddies were all texting and concerned but only two of them ever rang Dax and Jordan. I appreciate those two for actually calling and talking to him. Cause all Dru could do was talk and so all their texts were useless really. I'd read aloud, his texts to him and answer for him if he felt like it.
I dunno, maybe I'm being a little harsh on his old highschool buddies, but I figured if you really cared, you'd call, and only two did. I wasn't impressed. Dru was bored all week being on lockdown and what would've been really nice was to have heard from these friends who were 'so concerned'.
I guess outta sight outta mind.
Dru doesn't care though, it's just me. So I need to get over myself. I just found their words to be just that, words and so felt their words were meaningless. Everyone has a life though and no one's lives stop just because you're having a trauma, that I do know. One day I'll forgive them, but not quite yet. Not that they care, or know hahahaha
We got an appointment with our personal Doctor on the Monday though, so we had some kind of guidance of what to do for Dru since the hospital gave us NOTHING.
He's so great. We've had him from the very start of moving here to Boise and so we trust him. He's been great to our family.
Dru had done pretty well with meds. He'd not thrown up since early Saturday morning and he'd taken next to no meds.
He took a pill for nausea and one heavy pain med. That was it.
Dr Davis told us that it'd be a couple of weeks. I don't think Dru believed him, but he does know as it's been a couple of weeks and he's only going in today for a half day at work.
He said not to do anything until we saw him in a week. He had to have complete brain rest. He said even opening your eyes is making your brain work, so for him to keep his eyes closed as much as possible.
For the first few days, that's exactly what he did. Basically slept all day and all night.
About Thursday he started to stay up a little longer and hang out a little more.
Then he decided he wanted to come to the mtb race. I didn't know if that was a good idea, but he did ok.
There were A LOT of people who helped us. It was really great. We have a wonderful support system.
What I really needed though, was someone to come clean my house, but no one did, but I never asked anyone either.
My friend Hilary came over and helped me clean my bathroom which was awesome and my other friend Ashley came over and helped sweet my kitchen floor.
I just really wanted someone to come and clean. Even just help me clean. That's what I needed. But people are busy. I know that.
Dinners were provided for, though, and people shopped for me and helped out with the kids, cause life keeps moving forward right?
I asked for a little help and people pulled through. But I felt bad asking for cleaning help which would've been the best thing for me.
Then the second week I got sick.
I think my body had had enough. That's the week that would've been nice to have someone come and clean.
I grateful for everyone's prayers and help.
It's been a tough couple of weeks and I'm only just feeling a little better now, hence the reason I can write about it now.
It makes me think about how I can help if someone is facing a trauma.
It's tough.
What I learned is that if you want something you should ask, but asking is hard and you almost want someone to just come over and say "I'm coming for 2 hours and am going to do something for you, so pick what you need"
That would've been nice.
I also learned that some people's reactions are so weird. Some 'friends' never asked me about it, never asked about Dru or how he's doing or anything.
Turns out I'll be reassessing my friend pool.
I also realize I need to be forgiving. But if you can't ask how I am after a trauma in my life, then I'm not sure what we're doing here people.
Anyway, I'm grateful to Heavenly Father, who I know watches out for our little family. He always has and I know he was watching out for Dru.
I could've lost him.
I didn't cry about any of this until a few days later. I was doing the washing and was washing Dru's shorts he was wearing in the hospital at the time and it all hit me like a ton of bricks.
It's like stress is good to get you through things, but after the dust settles and you get to breathe for a second, it hits you and that when the tears came out.
I thought Dru was asleep in the basement so figured it was safe to cry, but he heard and came upstairs to see what all the hullabaloo was about. I felt bad and told him it was all just a little much and then he just hugged me and told me he was ok. And he was.
The kids have been total rockstars throughout this whole thing. Since Dru's been out of it and I've been sick, they've been getting themselves up and making their own lunches and getting themselves to school.
I dunno if their teeth were brushed or their hair, but I sure do appreciate them being able to look after themselves. They've been so amazing and I need to thank them for their efforts in this family over the past 2 weeks. I have good kids and I love them.
We saw the doctor again after a week and he told Dru to take it easy but to start reintroducing things into his life slowly and see how he feels.
So we've slowly tried certain things and his body is doing great with it.
He's hardly taken any meds at all, like nothing and is just letting his body heal itself.
He's hardly gotten any headaches which is amazing, and is healing so well.
He still has dizzy spells when his head gets off axis.
He had a spell of not sleeping well at all at nights.
He could GET to sleep but not STAY sleep and had restless legs. We asked the doctor what could be done and he said nothing. He said it's his body trying to figure things out and he shouldn't take anything and to wait it out and let his brain figure out this whole sleeping thing on it's own.
But just in the last two nights, Dru tried listening to easy music while sleeping and he's finally gotten two nights sleep without him getting up. So that's great news right?
This has been a scary ordeal for us/me. I just had a dream last night that Dru died, so I think I'm still slightly traumatized by the whole thing, even though I feel like I'm doing ok.
It's hard to be the caregiver sometimes and you run yourself ragged.
It's been an interesting experience. People say stupid things too, like tell us their death ladder stories and ask about what's going to happen about the shop hahahaha It's like "that's the least of our worries"
Now we have a HUGE bill coming in the mail that we'll have to try to figure out how to pay, from the hospital. I've cried multiple times about that. Oh and our insurance told us they aren't going to pay for the Saint Als stay as they feel as if they didn't follow correct protocol according to their insurance standards.
So that's nice.
Dru's boss says he'll help us fight it. So we'll see what happens. Bastards!!!! IT WASN'T OUR FAULT YOU HEARTLESS SOB'S.
Stupid insurance.
Anyway, that's about all I can think of for now.
Always an adventure.
