Soooo

I totally got my period a couple of days ago.
I KNEW IT.
Anyway if anyone in Boise would like to drop in and check in on my family over the next week and see if things are ok, that'd be awesome.
Maybe take Emiko to the park for an hour?
Maybe see if anyone wants dinner on the weekend?
Weekends will be hard fro Dru cause his sister won't be with him.
Hey man I'm just saying..................
Drus probably embarrassed.
Let's hope he doesn't read this.
So I leave tomorrow afternoon and after a long 25ish hours I'll be in the HOMELAND..........
I can't believe it.
I'm excited.
Can you tell since this is the second time I'm blogging about it?
Man home and with my family.  I can't wait.
It's gonna be so awesome.
I wonder how my life would've been different had I lived in NZ my whole marriage.
I wouldn't have met anyone in the states, just his family and I'd probably barely know them.
Interesting to think about.
Imagine if I didn't know you what a hole that would leave in your life?
LOL
Hopefully I'll get to blog in NZ.  We'll see how it all goes I guess.
Thank goodness for skype, that's all I can say.
Plus the app Viber so I can text and ring Dru for free from my cell phone.
Loving that one.
Go technology.
Alright well I guess I was just taking a break from tidying, washing and packing.
Back to the grindstone........or maybe I might take a nap, something tells me I'm gonna need it to get through these next 2 days.
WISH YOU COULD ALL COME WITH ME.........................party central baby.
So excited.

180's baby

So I got measured by Chris this morning and in the last 2 weeks of working out with him I've lost 4 pounds and 2% body fat.
Can you even believe that?
I'm telling you man Chris is freak'n awesome and so am I.
He kicks my butt, motivates me and helps create a better me.
SO.WORTH.THE.MONEY.
Plus he's like almost half the price of the regular trainers at my gym I go to and 100% better.
Alright well I haven't been trained by every trainer I guess so I can't officially say that, but listen, if you've got the best why try the rest right?
He told me this morning 'No eating chocolate while you're in NZ'
I'm like 'Awwww come on man, that's like telling you to not eat a philly cheese steak sandwich if you're in Philly, it can't be done'
He's like 'I don't care, just cause you're in NZ doesn't give you free range to eat whatever you want'
I'm like 'Alright, alright, man I'll try to be good, but I'm not NOT having ANY  chocolate while home, I just can't make that promise, but I CAN promise to work out and do try and do my best while home NOT to gain back any of this hard work I've taken off'
Love Chris.
So just a little shout out to my Boise peeps, you looking for an awesome trainer?  Chris is the only stop you'll have to make.  I'm living proof that that man works miracles man and YOU'RE WORTH IT.
Maybe you'll have to sacrifice those shoes, or jeans, or colouring your hair, or that fancy make up you're buying but what's more important?  That's right a HEALTHY YOU and not just for you FOR THE CHILDREN PEOPLE, THINK OF THE CHILDREN LOL
Good one Milz ..........................
*Ahem* Anyhooo I know we all know what we're SUPPOSE TO BE DOING and we all know that we should be working out AT LEAST 4 times a week and we SHOULD be doing weights AT LEAST three of those times a week and we should be doing CERTAIN KINDS of weights as WOMEN.....................but the BIG question is ARE WE DOING IT?
I bet if you were paying for it that'd be a big motivator right?  Not to waste your money?  Right?
That's what I thought.
I'm just saying man.
You might KNOW what you're SUPPOSE to be doing but until you're ACTUALLY DOING IT..........nothings gonna happen.
Chris will make it happen.
Oh yeah baby, loving it.
HERE I COME HOT/HEALTHY  BODY.....................just a few more months to go..................whooooooooooohooooooooooooooo
loving it.

New Zealand

So I've been telling everyone that I'm excited to go home for the first time in 4 years right?
And up until about half an hour ago I was REALLY excited.
But now I'm sitting her with a pitt in my stomach choking back tears thinking about leaving Dru and the kids for a week.

I must be due for my period.
Man I better get it today so I don't have it back home...............TMI?

Anyway I never thought I'd be such a wimp.
I think the hardest leave is Emiko really when I think about it.
It's just too much to ask of her to come home with me though.
25 hours of traveling just one way,  and the time difference will make for one crabby 7 month old.
Do you think she'll forgive me for doing this?
Do you all think I'm a bad mother for leaving her?
Every time I tell someone I'm leaving her they give me this look of shock.  I'm not sure whether it's a look of 'Man she's so lucky' or a look of 'I can't believe you'd leave your baby for a week'
Guilt is starting to creep in.
I haven't felt guilt in a little while to tell you the truth, I was thinking I was getting a handle on the whole guilt/mother thing.
Apparently I still have a ways to go.
It's for the best, I KNOW this, but I'm sitting here crying...............................I must be due for my period.

I'm going to have the BEST TIME EVER back home man.
My sister just emailed me yesterday and goes
" Ok see ya soon!!! CANT WAIT, im BUSTING AT THE SEEMS to see ya, its soooooo going to be awesome man

sez "

My one brother goes to me "Party central next Monday Milz, we can't wait to see you man"

My other brother goes to me "Sleep overs every night?  Is that us?"

Another brother, when he found out I wasn't going to come told me he was thinking of selling his truck so I could come over cause "You can't NOT be here Milz at the wedding, you HAVE to be here"

I'm going to see 2 nephews and a niece that I've never met before.

The WRIGHT family haven't been in the same room for 4 years and it's all gonna change next week and I can't wait.

They're some of my very best friends and it's hard to be away so much.

I'm grateful to Dru for being ok with this.  I know he feels bummed out he can't come, but he also understands what this means to me.

I don't think I've been away THIS long from my WHOLE family EVER!!

Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong people..........but I can't think of a time.

WHO AM I WITHOUT DRU OR MY KIDS BY MY SIDE?

Me, that's who.

A 35 year old kiwi looking to have some fun with her family back home for a week.

Dru's mother was going to come up but due to her hip being replaced it's gonna be a little hard so his eldest sister is coming down with her son to 'man the ship' while Dru's at work for the week.

I feel really bad about this BUT I also feel really good about it at the same time if that makes any sense.

She's gonna have about a years worth of chocolate to take home with her for doing this HUGE favour to our family, that's all I'm saying.

I have a huge amount of mixed emotions about the whole thing, from panic, to joy, to excitement, to guilt, to worry, to anticipation, to anxiety and the list goes on.

GET A GRIP MILZ..................................................

I'm so happy, yet so nervous, yet so excited..........................................

Maybe no one should hang out with me the last week, who knows what I'll be like..........

Success

 So at the end of first grade Masaru came home with this plant.  It was about as tall as the stick you can see if you look really hard.
It's more than doubled it's height AND the other day it sprouted a flower for us.
Masaru was ecstatic.
I feel bad for it though in this small plastic cup.
So eventually I need to gather up some dirt and find a bigger container to put this in.
Masaru said it's a sunflower, but is it?
He wanted to put it straight out in our front yard but I said it'd be best for it to be in that cup inside until it gets a little stronger.
I think I'll keep it inside but, like I said, just change the container for now.
I'm proud of team Nakaya for keeping it alive..............................I need more plants.

The Birthday Bash

 So after an exhausting night of making the cake, I woke up and had to still shop for last minute things and tidy the house.  So it was a busy day of getting prepared for the party.
I had a mate come over the last hour and help me with the food which was a really nice help for me.
Here are the decorations.
Special ordered from Oriental Trading Company.  Love those guys.

 So we painted everyones nails (well except that special boy in the corner, bless his heart) and made headbands.
Here are all the friends.
I told Yuki to lay down in the front like a rock star.
Can you believe that pose?
What rock stars is she watching?  We don't even have TV?  Dru and I were cracking up for ages about this pose.

 Pin the horn on the Unicorn.
Funny side story.
So Dru and I are looking up Unicorns to copy and I go 'Clearly you're going to draw this right babe, since you're the master drawer and all'
He had to decline due to the fact that he'd be really upset if he couldn't get it PERFECT.
Damn A type.
So I drew the Unicorn and I think it turned out alright.

 Yuki, of course, LOVED IT.
And in a cherry on the top, she totally WON!!!

 Then we opened presents.
I LOVE her face in these pictures.
She got WAY too many presents but deserves to be spoiled once in a while right?

 She had great reactions to ALL gifts and said thanks and made everyone feel special.
I was really proud of her.

 Still opening...........

Look at that face! Love it.

Then we ate cake and pizza, fruit and veges, not in that order either.

Then we headed outside to beat on the pinata.
Isn't she wonderful?

Except for that freaky stare she's got going on.

LOL
Love Yuki's face of determination in this shot.

It was a lot harder than we thought.  The head came off and so Dru just had to pour it out.

Good times.

Here's her tent we found.  We jimmied it so it could fit over her bed.  We're hoping it'll help with her phobia of the dark.
She has told me this last week that she's started saying her own personal prayers at night and hasn't been in our bedroom THE WHOLE WEEK during the night.
It's a Christmas miracle people!!!  The faith of a child is a precious thing and I'm glad she's doing better at nights.
I'm sure this tent will help out as well.
This morning she told me she loved sleeping in it, so that's progress alright.
(This is what she got with your money Kristin, a bling hat and some rainbow hair piece)

So I take her to the doctors this morning and she does well.
She gets 3 shots and it was HORRIBLE PEOPLE...............JUST HORRIBLE.
I mean she was screaming and crying and screaming.
Poor, poor girl.
So we stopped off at MacDonalds for lunch (not me) and she seems to be in a happier mood.
She weighed in at 38.6lbs (17.5kgs) which puts her in the 42nd %ile
She measured in at 42 inches (1.06m) which puts her in the 39th %ile
So she's a little under average for both which is fine by me.
With her older brother being over 90th for both height and weight however, it makes her look like a shrimp.
Oh well.

Yuki's a good girl and we love her.
Multiple people tell me how stunning she is, some being random strangers.  One said that she's the most beautiful girl she's ever seen in her life.........................we'll take it right Yuki?
She's one good looking girl, but more importantly she's a GOOD girl on the inside.  She cares and helps and is very affectionate and likes attention (like someone else we know who shall remain nameless *aaaach Milz oooooo*)
She loves her sister and brothers.  Her and Takeshi have become quite the friends as of late and it's great to watch.
I'm glad she's my daughter.  She loves me and I appreciate it, faults and all.
I hope she had a great time cause she deserves it.
She's adored by her father and it shouldn't be any other way.  She, in return, adores her father just as much and I hope they maintain that special relationship.
5 years with an amazing girl in my life.  I cherrish it and hope to have many more with her in the future.
Love you bub.
Mum xxx

Yuki's cake

So you know me and my cakes.  They get their very own blog post.
Yuki's BIG party was today.
I only do BIG party's for certain ages.
Five is one of those ages.
She told me after her four year old party she wanted a Unicorn party for her fifth party.
I waited and waited while having ideas in my head, but what if she changed?
She never did.
So Unicorn party it was.
I looked at cakes and had ideas and changed my mind often.
I finally came up with this plan.
I basically spent  Tuesday making this cake and I LOVED doing it.
Here is the middle.
The classic rainbow cake.  A MUST for a Unicorn party right?

I then wanted to do buttercream icing for the smoother but have never used it before.
So I remembered my mate posting a TO DIE FOR butter cream recipe on her cooking blog HERE and so decided to try it.
I'm glad I did.
So here she is all buttered up.

Then when Dru got home we got our game faces on for the rest of the cake.
White fondant as the base.

And here's the finished product.  We started off with doing the rainbow, then with the left over I did those balls around the bottom and the tiny dots on the back.
Doing that 5 was a nightmare and we used my Christmas present cake machine for the lettering.
I found the Unicorns at Walmart.  I wasn't about to gumpaste those bad boys.  Waste of precious time for me.

So I found these special candles that, when lit, their flames are pink!!
Perfect right?
You can't see the Happy Birthday too well but I think it works.
This is one of my most favourite cakes so far.
I LOVE how it turned out and am VERY proud of team Nakaya.
Nailed it once again.

Dru, however, was D.O.N.E by the end.
It's so exhausting.
So he had some cereal while we basked in the Unicorn cake glory.

Here it is on the inside.
It tasted good as well, so double bonus.
I love the kids faces in the background as I show them the inside of the cake.
That says it all doesn't it?
Unicorn party equals lots of rainbow and we had lots of rainbow.

Here's Yuki seeing her cake for the first time.
So cute man.
She couldn't stop smiling.
She loved it.
When her friends started coming to her party she'd greet them and say "Wanna come and see my cake?" every.single.time.
Made me happy.
Masaru had piano practice today and I overheard him telling his teacher "So every birthday my Mum and Dad make the BEST cakes EVER"
Then proceeded to tell her of the vast cakes from his past birthdays.
That makes me happy as well.
It's a tradition I'll always do if I can.
I love it.

Will it ever end?

So Chris was gone all summer and now he's back.
I saw him for the second time today and got measured etc.
He said I'm doing better than right after the baby..........................so that's good LOL
But let's be honest, I haven't made much progress since the baby has been here, with my body.
Like I posted before I lack my motivation I had last year.
I'm tired and busy and lazy and can't be bothered and all the rest of it you know.
All the excuses we give ourselves for not working out and eating healthy.
I know I can do it.
I know it's inside of me.
I just need to tap into it again.
And THIS time I can KEEP it due to being done with children.
Bonus.
*HUGE SIGH*  So here I am teetering on the edge.........................cause when I start THAT'S IT, it's a lifestyle change and it can only come from me, but it means change, big change.
It means being busier, getting up earlier, being more aware, having ONE MORE THING to have to work on, but I REALLY WANT the end results.
Problem is ALL THAT WORK it takes to GET the results.
LOL
Poor me.
I'm tired thinking about it already........................
*ANOTHER HUGE SIGH*
But I gotta start.
I need to do it.
It's good for me.
I feel good.
I look great.
I'm healthier.
It's a great example to my kids.
Plus numerous other reasons right?
*ONE FINAL HUGE SIGH*
Well................here we go, time to get the best body of my life............right in time for the holiday seasons LOL
Great time to start right?
 Wish me luck.

One thing I've found this time around is I haven't had as much negative thoughts about my body  however.  They're still there, but nothing like it used to be.   I really think I made huge mental changes about my body image last year that have had lasting results.
I still don't look at women and resent their skinny bodies or 'compare' mine with theirs.  It's extremely freeing and positive for me.  It's been a huge mental help for me this time around which is always nice right?
I've still got a long way to go but any positive self esteem results, I'll take.
Bottom line is I'm in charge of my body and what goes inside of it.
I'm overweight at the moment because of ME, no one else.  I can't blame anyone on my body except me.  I overeat and I eat the wrong things.  This is why I'm overweight.  It's not the skinny neighbours fault, it's mine.
And I've PROVEN to myself if I work hard and eat right, I too, will get great results which make me feel good and look good as well.
I'm not naturally skinny and as appealing as that seems to me sometimes it would result in me being lazy with my health and maybe result in bad things later on in my life due to the lack of exersize and healthy eating.
So (and I can't believe I'm saying this) in a way being overweight due to lack of healthy choice is a blessing, because it shows me what I'm doing wrong and motivates me to do the RIGHT thing for myself and for my family.

Ok everyone put their hands in the middle with me...............ready...........................on three let's say go MILZ...............one...............two.................three..............GOOOOOOOOO MILZ
Whooohoo yaaaaa
Double handed fist pump.....................

Boise Temple

The Boise Temple has been closed for construction the last year or more and is opening up again at the end of the year.
At the end of this month they're re-dedicating it and letting everyone who has tickets go through and have a look at the inside of it.
Our neighbours are excited to go through and I'm going to invite our other neighbours as well.  I just need to make sure I get the tickets for them.
I'd LOVE to go to the re-dedication meeting as I've never been to one but I'm SURE the chances of being able to go are slim to none.
I don't know how you get tickets to that or if you have to be important or know someone or what.  I guess I'll keep my ear out.
I just never thought I'd ever go considering NZ already had a temple.
Dru said he's been to one and it was awesome.
Maybe once in my lifetime I'll get to go right?
I wonder who I need to get Yuki to drop cookies off to with her big blue eyes to score me a ticket?
Anyway here's a video all about it below.
I can't wait for it to re-open.
I've missed it.

Journal Entry Seventyone

What kind of dreams do you have for your children?

Click HERE to read mine.

What do you do all day?

So I was hanging out with some people and this was what a woman said to me during a conversation.......................get ready for it....................................."Well Melissa, what do you all day?  You could help with blah blah blah blah blah................I forget what the rest of what she said was due to the first seven words that came spewing out of her mouth.

'SO MELISSA, WHAT DO YOU DO ALL DAY?  I mean it can't be much right?  Since you're home ALL DAY........................I mean no biggie right?  You must have OODLES of time to do random crap.'

After the image of smacking her left, I pushed away the reaction of saying "Well how about I give you all four of my children for a week and we'll see what you're doing all day"

I mean do we REALLY STILL have people who believe that being a stay at home mother is some kinda SINCH?  Some kind of way to avoid doing the HARD YARDS of actually working outside of the home in a REAL job as opposed to this stay at  home mother business?

I can't believe I felt like I had to justify to this woman about how busy I REALLY AM during the day.
I'd like to see a mental image of what this person thinks I'm doing all day.
Cause last time I checked a house doesn't tidy itself (I've tried that) and a DECENT HEALTHY dinner doesn't make itself either and then there's four children to orchestrate for a whole day ONE OF WHICH is a 6 MONTH OLD PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!

I'm a little bent out of shape.
Ironically my friends later on jokingly asked this woman what SHE DID ALL NIGHT since she had no kids at home and her husband working late hours and maybe SHE SHOULD be making their and my kids lunches and doing our washing etc.
She didn't like that and back tracked trying to convince us that she's busy with important stuff at night despite not having kids at home.
I (horribly) got a giggle out of that since I'm not perfect.

I'm the busiest I've ever been in my life including the mission since on the mission I got a full nights sleep.
Now days if Dru and I get a full nights sleep it's a true blessing.

Being a stay at home mother is a tough and busy job, if you're attempting to do it right, which I attempt every day to do.

PLUS if I DO HAVE some down time why is that a crime?
Jobs have smoko's and lunch breaks right?
How come I need to feel bad if I get a chance to read?  Or blog?  Or talk to a mate?

Well people I don't feel bad, I'm over feeling bad.
I do what I can and take the down times when they come and embrace them with zero guilt.

I feel sorry for this lady, that her perception of motherhood is so skewed.
If I had control over my temper I could've let this woman know in some kind and helpful way.
I'm not there yet so it'll have to wait till another time I guess.

The whole 'Well what do you do all day' line needs to be avoided to mothers across the world at all costs people just like the 'When are you due' line when you don't know a person and the 'How much do you weigh?' and the 'How old are you' line  as well as the 'What size are your pants' line.
Isn't this common sense?

It's true that common sense is not so common and for that....................I need to forgive and move on with my easy life of a stay at home mother of four kids under 7 ;)

Over

 So with Yuki at pre-school today it feels as it summer is really coming to a close.
In about 17 days it will be officially over and then Autumn here we come.
I had goals this summer with the kids and we all did a great job.
We got up and did our chores bedrooms, teeth, clothes and Masaru read and did his journal and piano.
Then it was decided by the kids that they wanted to do exersize each day.
So exersize we did.
I made them up charts and we recorded running and biking.
Then towards the end of the summer we also started the scooter as well.

 Our mailboxes aren't on our house they're in little groups along the street.  So we'd exersize between the mailboxes.
I'd record their times and they'd compete against themselves.
For the most part they liked it.
There were some better days than other.
Even the neighbour kids would come out to compete against themselves as well.  Their parents were appreciative.

The highlighted green is their best times.
I think this will be a tradition I'll keep trying to do during the summer months as long as I can get away with it.
I loved summer with my kids.
It was great.
We had a really fun time together and I'll miss it.
Being a mother to four is hard at times but I wouldn't have it any other way, I love it and them and I'm sad it's over but excited for my children to be at school/pre-school and to have this part of the season come towards us.
I always thought that this upcoming season was my favourite with Halloween/Thanksgiving and Christmas but I just had the best summer and so I'm not sure if that's true anymore.
I like the weather and being outside with my kids and having no homework and the routine being MY routine not forced to the schools routine.
Maybe it's equal?
Anyway I'm sure I'll get into the Autumn spirit soon enough but for now I"m still embracing the summer while it's here and know I'll be sad when it's OFFICIALLY gone.

Takeshi

 Masaru made this Eagle outfit for Takeshi.
So here he is showing it off.
Although he looks like an eagle in trouble in this first shot doesn't he!?!

Takeshi is quite sensitive.
If you tell him off he's racing off to his room to take himself out of your presence.
It's always been a great thing for me and for him.
Time out from each other is great when emotions are high.
I love him.

Yuki

 It was Yuki's first day in pre-school today.
As I've said, I love it for a couple of reasons, one being Masaru can walk her in the mornings she goes.
She was excited to be going this morning and I couldn't blame her.
I remember being excited for things like this as a child...........................man it was so long ago.

 Here she is with her two walking buddies.
One is making a pretty odd face.

 Here she is holding a salamander that her cuzzies own.
I love that she's not afraid to do stuff like this.  Must help that she has brothers.
I try not to push my fear of creepy crawlies onto my children as it's a hindrance to me.
I also tried not to push my fear of the dark onto the kids but somehow that didn't work............oh well, Dru and I will just pay for that one for the next few years.

She's pretty cute man.
I worry that I don't give her enough attention and am glad for the time I spend doing her hair every day.  It's one on one time that we sit and chat.
She loves affection and I've been trying to give her more lately and she loves it.
I need to remind myself to stop and pay her some attention you know?
I hope I can keep doing a better job of that so she realizes that despite me being busy and having three other kids, a husband and household to run,  that she's an important part of my life as well.
Love you bub
Mum xx

Masaru

So we had a good weekend this Labour weekend.
We did nothing but met all our goals.
Mine was to mop and Dru's was to clean the cars.
Check and check......go team.
Dru took Masaru mountain biking on Saturday morning and got a shot for the blog.
He's going to try and take Masaru more to get him fitter plus Masaru shows an interest in it, therefore we need to embrace it.

This is how Masaru was all of yesterday.
I guess he had something happen to him on his nose and so put this on.
Our neighbour asked Masaru where his nose was because since it was camouflaged it was no where to be seen.
Surely it was annoying but I guess not.

I also asked him to make his bed and this is what he did.

Is it just me or is this bed not made properly?

It's too bumpy not to have all sorts of goodies underneath there right?
I should've pulled the quilt up and revealed what was under there.
Oh well, next time.................as I'm sure there'll be a next time.
Love you bub.
Mum xx

6 months

 So this sweet girl is 6 months old........................about a week ago.
So I guess I should announce that I'm not breast feeding anymore.
She got 5 months worth and then the same thing happened as last time.
I'm ok with it now and she's doing great.

 She's decided to be a little moodier as of late.
But since she was next to perfect for a while I can forgive her for being a little harder.
Church is tough, since she's suppose to be napping you know she just squirms around and Dru and I tag team to try and keep her happy.
She's pretty good though and is still a trooper when it comes to sleeping.
She's down to two naps a day and 4 feeds a day.

Plus I introduced her to solids last week.
She LOVES it and I'm happy.
I switched all her clothes to 6-9 month clothes and went to put an outfit on her that wouldn't fit around her thighs.
I chuckled to myself and put the outfit away for some other smaller thighed child.
I love that she's so chubby.
I love Emiko, she makes me happy and I'm glad she's a part of our family.
Everyone loves her and she loves them.  She definitely does better being around all of us and part of the action rather than being somewhere with no one around.  Forth child syndrome I guess?  But of course that hardly ever happens since our place is smaller and our family larger.
She's sweet and lovely and I feel truly blessed.
Love you bub xxx

Me, you ask?
How am I doing?
I'm doing pretty good.  I haven't had a down day in quite a while to be honest.  My moods seem more smoothed out and I seem to be really happy.
I need to find my motivation to work out though and get fit.
I know it's around here somewhere.
I had it last year..................now if I could just find that 'safe' place I put it we'd be money ;)

Here's a video of Emiko eating for the VERY FIRST TIME.