Loved to death

That's the only title I could think of for this blog post.
This is dedicated to 'dede' or as we'd all say it 'kiwi'.
My mother brought this for Masaru when he was born, and he's had it with him since. It's pretty tattered and worn. I'm afraid every time I put it in the wash that it'll dissapear.
It doesn't come out looking cleaner anymore. It just comes out looking the same.
Dede has been there for Masaru's whole life so far and hopefully will be around for more good and sad times.
Dede gets us out of some sticky situations with Masaru and helps Masaru to go places by himself, that he wouldn't normally do with ease.
We owe dede and hope he's around for a few more years.
He's already lost his voice and had an operation done on him!
My mother tried to replace him by buying another kiwi but Masaru wasn't having a bar of it.
Funnily enough Yuki has her soft toy she loves and I slept with about 7 every night when I was a kid. They honestly saved me from monsters, I sware.
Thanks for helping keep the monsters away dede, we love you, especially your BFF Masaru!!
You're a real trooper.
Here's to soft toys who were our BFF's as children.

Baby #3

Here it is! Isn't that a nice shot of my third little baby?
There's it's head and it's little hand going up towards it's mouth. Probably about to suck it's fingers like it's older brother and sister!
It's measuring just right, so I'm so happy.
There's nothing like seeing your baby for the first time.
It was moving around tons. Maybe I'm eating too much sugar!
I'm just SO happy to see this kid.
Makes all the sick days worth it.
Love you bub!

Memory #5

When I was about 6 years old the principal taught our math class.
Now I was friends with the class goodie good. You know, the kid who NEVER gets told off. Always got the gold stars and awards, whenever the teacher was talking about an example, it was always THAT kid.
Yeah, I was mates with her. Don't worry it was only for a couple of years, then we parted ways.
Anyway when you got through your math book with the BIG squares you got a BRAND NEW math book with the LITTLE squares.
Man was I pumped about this.
Now my mate had like 3 pages left and then she was moving onwards and upwards to the little square book.
I was so upset that she got to move up and not me. I had like half my book to go. Who knows how she got through it so fast, maybe extra homework (geek) jokes man jokes.
Anyway I decided to conjour up a plan. I'd rip MOST of my pages out.
So I started.
Well I got half way up the page and the principal BUSTED me and asked "What happend"
I didn't think he'd be too understanding about my plan.
So I did what any 6 year old would do and lied about it.
"Oh I just found it in my desk like this"
"Are you sure Melissa"
"Yes"
"Alright, well we'll have to get you a new book tomorrow"
Yesssssssssssssssssssssss my plan worked.
I went home and felt SICK.
I felt so sick about my lie I CONFESSED to my parents.
Now who's the goodie good?
So my parents rang the principal and told him the truth.
I remember lying in bed and even though it felt good to tell the truth I knew I was gonna get it tomorrow.
My principal wasn't a very forgiving man. I knew I was gonna be embarrassed.
So I went in the next day and he basically told the whole class what I did in a manner of speaking. I was super embarrassed and had to tape up my book and use it till it was finished.
Don't worry folks I eventually got to my small squared math book and learned a valuable lesson.
Stick with the first plan and don't fess up, then you'll get the small squares and no embarassment.
Jokes man Jokes.

Sunbeam

My little boy is growing up. He's at pre-school, and loving it, and now he's moved up classes at church.
He used to be in the nursery which was mostly the kids playing, eating and having a good time but now he has to actually sit a little more and listen and sing and not play as much.
I think being in pre-school has helped with this adjustment, but he still has a hard time with us leaving him.
It all started way back with his first day of nursery and hasn't really stopped.
I wonder what his deal is?
We've left him twice in his life. Once when he was 10 months old for 7 days and just recently when Yuki and I went to New Zealand.
When we were down in Utah, the first night I was putting him in bed and he said "Please don't leave me here mum"
I felt so bad that he thought we were gonna leave him.
I don't know what it is about us leaving him, but it's still a problem.
He cried at the beginning of the movie E.T because E.T's mother left him.
He was so upset.
I don't know where this paranoia comes from?
He's been the same way with Sunbeams. He's the only child, out of 4, that has a hard time. I try to talk about it all week and he's so pumped about it.
Remember though, he's all about the hype!
We haven't had to sit with him though. Eventually we can leave him. We have to really coax him though. I wonder when it'll stop.
Well I"m the music leader so we have to go through all of this again when I leave and the Sunday School teacher comes in.
I just come in from 11am to 11:30am and Sunbeams start at 10am and goes to 12 noon.
"Please stay mum, I don't want you to go"
Yesterday I just dragged him into the room and left him laying there.
Once we're gone he's fine, it's just the drama while we're there.
He's the same way with pre-school. Last week I had to stay for an HOUR before he was ok with us going.
I've left him when he's not ready for us and I have to pry him off of me like a leech on your skin, kicking and screaming.
It's tough for me to leave when he's like this, I feel like such a bad mother.
I've tried everything, so unless you have something particularly unique like your a child psychologist, then we'll just have to keep hoping that one day he'll be fine.
Actually the whole point of this post wasn't to talk about this, it was actually to say that Masaru's a sunbeam now and, apart from the leaving, is loving it with his 3 other little mates and wonderful teachers, especially his music teacher.
And to say that I'm very proud of him and all the 'other' progress he's making in his life at the moment.
He's a great helper and has a tender heart.
He really does love all of us so much and tells us all the time.
I love that he's my eldest child. He'll be a great example for the rest of the kiddies that come our way.
He sings the Sunbeam song which starts off "Jesus wants me for a Sunbeam, to shine for him each day"
Well Masaru is a Sunbeam in our family, and he's doing a great job of shining for Jesus each day.
Love you Bub!

One of a kind!

My mate, Rashawn, made this dress for Yuki, right before we left for Moscow.
I complained to her that when Yuki was born she got a blanket and not a 'dress' like the ones she does.
As a side note that blanket she gave Yuki has been one of the three staple blankets we've used with Yuki, so I really had nothing to complain about.
I thought I'd give it a shot though.....................................and it worked.
Always gotta try man, the worst that can happen is they say no.
The amounts of things I've gotten by just asking, well that's another post.
Anyhoo, Yuki finally fit's it. Well kind of.
It comes down to the ground, almost but I think it's how it suppose to be. The top part fits her well and I think it looks great.
She got so many looks and compliments about it last Sunday.
So here's Yuki, striking a pose for the camera and showing off her new, hand-made, one of a kind, crocheted dresses from Mrs. Fowler.
Thanks Rashawn, love you!!
P.S As a side note, Yuki also has another one of a kind dress that my sister in law made, remember, it was her blessing dress.
I guess Yuki just looks good in hand made!

Mates

In my three weeks back in Utah I got to catch up with many of my mates and it was awesome.
I'm so glad I have good friends to do things with and to have fun with.
I appreciate the lunches, dinners, games, talks, play dates and fun I had with all of them.
It was also really nice to go back to our old ward and see everyone.
Everyone seems to be doing well and loving life, and that's so good to see and hear you know.
It also got me missing my old ward though. I love it there.
I can't believe who gave us Christmas gifts while we were there too.
I didn't give anyone back here in Moscow or in Utah any Christmas gifts LOL
I think I have better friends that what I am to them.
I'll try and do better next year. I won't be pregnant and close to throw up next Christmas, well at least I hope not.
This picture is what one of my mates, Laura, made Yuki for Christmas. A little Tee and a ribbon. Cute aye!
I just thought I'd do a post thanking all my mates for making the 3 weeks a wild success!!
I honestly didn't feel like doing ANYTHING ever!!!!
So it was nice to get out with people we care about and to visit with people who care about me and my family.

Wipe Out!!!!

I dunno if any of you have seen this show but it is HILARIOUS!!
Dru and I watched it last night on the computer and we were crying we were laughing so hard.
Remember my goal was to laugh with my husband this week? Well that's just what we did last night.
It's not just the people wiping themselves out, it the COMMENTS the hosts make whilst they're doing it.
Such a crack up.
Dru and I went to bed still giggling into the night with the funniest parts of the episode.
I'm laughing right now about it.
So when the kids are in bed, if you have any, settle in on the couch with your hubby, if you have one, and be prepared to laugh your butt off.
Good times, good times.
Gotta love the Japanese and their ideas for game shows.

Bit of a moan.........................

Can I just say that last week was one of the crappiest weeks I've had in a long time?
Well if I can't then too bad I guess, cause I just said it.
Feel free to stop reading if you're having a great week/day and don't wanna be reading a downer post. I'll understand.
It must've been the combination of the 3 weeks in Utah and being exhausted from the traveling, being pregnant and all the unpacking and washing and tidying that needed to be done last week as well as getting back into reality.
I felt really sick about 4 days out of the 7 last week, so that didn't help.
I mean I don't know how women can push through feeling like they need to throw up at any second, to do all that a mum has to do. Don't even get me to list all the things either, it starts getting a little depressing at how much I'm not doing, you know.
Now before you all start with, your being too hard on yourself, you all do it too, get a little bit down sometimes about motherhood and all we need to be doing, right! You don't have to answer that, but I've been around too many women to know that this is true.
I also know that we all need a good little moan to someone about it before we're on the up and up and ready to do battle again the next day.
So let me have my little moan and then this week will be a new week.
I'm sick of people giving their unsolicited advice about my parenting and what I'm doing wrong.
It's real easy to point out others weaknesses that just happen to be a strength for someone else.
But I bet I have real valid strengths that just happen to be anothers weakness.
I know my weaknesses and what I need to work on.
I'm well aware of all of them and if I need help with it I'll ask the people I feel safest around for some advice about what to do, otherwise, no one needs to be told they're doing a crappy job with their kids no matter how it's said and the intention.
I've said it before but I'm thinking, daily, about how to improve in the motherhood area.
No one needs to be kicked while their down.
I think I'm an ok mother. I don't think I'm gonna get mother of the year award or anything close, but I love my kids, I don't swear at them or beat them, I feed them good food and read to them, play with them, do activities with them and love them the best I can.
I'm doing the best I can, and I'd appreciate it if others could see that and support me in it rather than tear me down about it.

You'll never change a person by being negative, the most change will happen when your positive with a person.

So I was feeling sorry for myself about that this week.
I hope I don't do this to people, and I hope if I do they tell me about it, in a nice way, so I can change.
I don't wanna make people feel like crap.
Then I didn't do much cooking around the house.
The first night I actually laid on the couch while Dru cooked, cleaned, put the kids in bed and came over and looked after me.
I'm thankful, daily, that I have him in my life. I dunno what I'd do without him.
He never moans at how little I do or how ugly I look that day cause I haven't showered and it's 5pm and there's no dinner even in the works.
He's always been good about it.
I guess all that tracting in the rain on my mission paid off.
That's another thing. I think last week I must've showered maybe 4 times and that's it.
I also just didn't feel like going outside cause it was cold and maybe I'd have to look somewhat presentable as well as if I met someone I might actually throw up in their mouth while talking to them.
I'm just grateful for mates who rang me and asked to hang out with me and the kids. Otherwise I don't know if I would've went outside much at all.
I also was feeling sorry for myself cause I was thinking about how my life is like groundhog day and I just pick up, clean, pick up clean, cook, clean, feed.
I said to Dru sometimes it's like I'm a zoo keeper!
Motherhood is the most publicly unrewarding job I've ever done.
Now don't get me wrong I didn't get into motherhood for the rewards of others. How can you? The only people who know what you do is you! So I know sometimes we have to give ourselves props and a big pat on the back for what we do day in and day out with no one seeing.
But let's be honest, you all know me and know how much I like attention and the spotlight. I'm in my element when infront of a crowd making them laugh and a part of a discussion.
Dru thanks me all the time, and that's enough.
Now I think part of my problem might be that I didn't read my scriptures at all last week as well.
So I couldn't feel heavenly fathers love either and how much he appreciates me and my sacrifice for his children in my job.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO this week is a new week and so far so good. I'm gonna pray, join the gym, read my scriptures, keep my head up, work hard, take a rest when I need it, love my kids and laugh with my husband.
Wish me luck.
And thanks for listening to me moan.

Shogatsu

This means 'new month, new moon, new year' it's the New Year celebration the Japanese do. Since they don't really celebrate Christmas since you have to be a majority christian nation for that, this is a huge, huge holiday celebration of the nation.
Dru's grandma always did it since he could remember. Obviously way before he was even born, or any of us, unless I have some 91 year old readers out there.
She always did a fabulous job man. She would have people come to her house in shifts. Family, neighbours, church members and so on.
I went to this celebration before Dru and I were married. When I came over for my first trip to the states and happend to be staying with Dru and his family over new year.
It was awesome.
I just can't believe how hard it must've been to do all the food she did.
Anyway, grandma is 91 and not doing so well. She's physically fine but mentally a little lost sometimes. I think she's done great for her age and how hard she's worked.
I remember her talking to me once and telling me she gets up at like 5 and goes to bed at like 11pm and hardly sits down cause 'there's too much to do'
I'm thinking, as I'm listening, what the hell does this woman do everyday? And feeling more and more lazy and beginning to understand where Dru gets part of his work ethic's from. That lady is a machine.
Honestly who works that hard?
Maybe you all do and I'm super super lazy.
Alright......back to the subject at hand. The torch was passed to the Nakaya family, meaning Dru's family. Dru's dad, Masaru (our son's namesake) did most of the work, with help from his kids. I helped with little, if nothing, but was really amazed at how much work goes into this food.
I have to tell you that I love sushi and would have it about 5 days a week if I could, GOOD sushi. Some of you might believe you don't like sushi but I won't believe you until you try the GOOD stuff. And his Grandmothers sushi was the good stuff.
Now you know you've got the GOOD STUFF when you don't have to dip it in soy sauce to help make it taste good.
One year I did this in front of his Grandma, I dipped her sushi in soy sauce.
Oh my goodness, you would've thought I'd killed her last born child, "What are you doing? My sushi doesn't need soy sauce, my sushi is good sushi, good sushi never needs soy sauce, don't dip it in there again"
Alrightiee then, so I tried it without, and low and behold her sushi held up WITHOUT the soy sauce.
Dru's extremely fussy when it comes to sushi and given, he's lived in Japan, the land of sushi, so there's cause for his fussyness.
He raves about his Grandma's sushi and loved this holiday.
I think Dru's family did a wonderful job and need a pat on the back.
I think the day was a huge success and I'm glad we were a part of it.
I don't think I'll ever be able to make sushi as good as his Grandma, BUT if I just keep sticking around for long enough, maybe, just maybe I might get a chance to have a go at helping the family make some one year and being a bigger part of it.
Aparently it took from 6pm to midnight to make it.
Now that's dedication.
They also have, another of my favourites, sunomono. OH man I think it's just this pregnancy but cucumber is my favourite and this is made out of just cucumber basically. Yummy.
Then there's crab, which I started to eat then after my sister in law gave her little speech at the table of how their bottom feeders and eat poison etc etc etc I put it down. Thanks!
Plus it takes so long to get a little meat out, I get frustrated.
Then there's teriaki chicken and inarizushi, mmmmmmmmmmm and lots more weird and sometimes yummy stuff.
What a great day.

Close ups

Here's some close ups of the kids we've taken since having our new camera.
I know, I know, I'm completely bias BUT bare with me anyway while I say this.....................I, personally think these darling little faces are the cutest things I've seen in my life and I'm completely in love with them.
They're beautiful and perfect in everyway and I need to have these pictures up on my fridge or something to remind me of how special they really are to me and to heavenly father.
It's so special to be a mother to these two and when your children look at you like this with their big eyes and bright smiles it's hard not to just love them the most.
I love my kids and I realize I'm very blessed to have them in my life.
It's why we all think our kids are the cutest and the most wonderful.............. no one sees our kids like we do as mothers, day in and day out with all the special little things they do.............it's why no one can convince us that their kid is cuter or more special............am I right............it's a loosing battle to tell me your child is cuter and it's because I have so much invested in them and so many special moments with them.
I have rough days, weeks............but bottom line, I love them and they love me, at the end of the day, looking at these pictures, I'm glad I do what I do, and see what I see.
I'm extremely blessed and I hope you all feel the same way about your kids.

Christmas Day

So, of course, we took tons of pictures of our children opening their presents. So this is the one way I thought I could do it since I love all the pictures and they tell a story.
Masaru is dressed in two different outfits cause one opening was Christmas Eve and the other was on Christmas morning.
Yuki's in the same outfit.
Masaru and Yuki didn't get up till around 8ish. So that was great for Dru and I. I went in and got Masaru and said "Santa came bub, let's go" He was so excited I thought he was going to fall down the stairs on the way to the basement.
We came downstairs and the Johnson family had already opened all their stuff. I guess you snooze you loose right?!?
So the kids gathered around and watched as Masaru and Yuki opened theirs. Masaru went first and then Yuki.

I'm pulling some funny faces in these pictures but, oh well.
Masaru got books, clothes, candy and the main gift was his trucks/cars. He LOVED them. He also got a book that reads to you from his Grandmother which he loves as well. He can listen to it with earphones as well. I'm gonna try and use it in sacrament and see if it works out.
Yuki got dolls, dolls oh and more dolls, ribbons, clothes, books and a play farm noise thing as well as candy and a pretend phone. Kids know though that their phone isn't real cause mum and dad don't use it. But every now and then she'd play with it.
I think it was exciting for their cousins to see all the gifts they were opening as well.
I agree, I love watching people open their presents. It's always so exciting to see what they got.
If you click on the collage of pictures they'll get bigger for you so you can see each picture better, just if you want.

This year Dru and I didn't get each other anything to open in the morning. We didn't do stockings either for each other. I was a little dissapointed with that as Dru does such a great job with doing my stocking. He's awesome. But you can spend a lot of money just doing each others stockings and we had spent enough.
Dru gave us our Christmas present early. I guess he had sat on some money he'd made in a side job earlier on in the year. He's really good like that. I can't keep anything from him for more than 2 days, and that was a speeding ticket I didn't want to tell him about.
So he comes home with GUITAR HERO and a WII as well as a beautiful Canon rebel camera from Costo we've been eyeing up for a while that comes with an additional lens and case etc etc. We love it. It was such a wonderful surprize. I also got my hair straightener too that I love, just never use much. Oh well.
So Dru and I did very well thanks to his secret keeping and being all sneaky.
Of course we had a great meal with family and good fun.
It was a great day.

Yuki's Christmas Eve

My hippie Joseph

We had Christmas this year at Dru's parents house.
Dru wanted to leave straight after his exam was out, which was fine by me. 3 weeks of 16 hour days can take a toll on you and he wanted outta Moscow!!
We went half way to Boise and stayed with our mates 'The Perry's'. Tom was one of Dru's comps on the mission AND he graduated from Moscow Law about 3/4 years ago. So him and Dru can sit and talk, talk, talk. It's fun and for once, I'm doing a lot of listening and Dru's doing more talking.
The trip from Boise to Salt Lake was long, snowy and slow due to an accident. So I was done.
It was nice to be in Bountiful.
We unpacked in our two rooms and they were messy for the whole 3 weeks. Dru and I aren't the tidiest. His family will be the first the voutch for that, they used to remind us often, I think they've given up, which is great.
Now anyone that's had us stay the night knows that Dru and I tend to just shove our kids out the door and keep sleeping. We'll change poopies and stuff but they're on their own for the most part.
So Dru's mum was good about the mornings with the grandkids. Thanks!!
All Dru's family were there and it was nice to see them all.
Dru's sister and I are both expecting a month apart. She's having twins though. So we were both still in the yuckie stage. That was fun.
Masaru and Yuki had a wonderful time with their cuzzies as well.
Christmas Eve we did a programme.
I could be wrong but I don't remember us doing anything specific on Christmas Eve. Correct me if I'm wrong Mum/Haydn/Sarah.
But Dru's family always do.
They do the little play of the birth of Christ and do a little talent section where the kids play an instrument and/or sing.
I think it's nice and I think a lot of people, at least in Utah, do this, after doing some listening and reading others blogs.
Well this year Masaru was Joseph. I was so proud of him. Joseph looked straight out of 'That 70's Show' but that's alright, I still thought he was super cute and talented.
It was a long programme for a 3 year old but he stood there and looked the part for the whole time.
Nice job Masaru.
Where was Yuki?
Well she was hanging upside down like a monkey with her Uncle Ryan in the background.
I've got a pic but it's on my other camera. Sorry. I need to get that figured out.
This year Masaru was so excited about Christmas. Really, it's been the first time he truely understood what was going on.
So we were excited to wrap and set things out for the kids.
I'll blog about Christmas next, this is getting a little long for even my most devoted readers. (Right Laura?)

"Mum................

So this morning Masaru wet the bed. This is what he told me.
"Morning Masaru"
"Hi mum, Mum the wet from the outside got into my bed, it wasn't me peeing the bed it was the wet from the outside that just got into this bed mum"

What am I suppose to say to that?

Questions answered

Alright a lot of you had questions so here's the answers.

How far along am I? Almost 12 weeks
Am I past the nastie sickies yet? That would be a big hell no.
Am I one of those women who never get sick or never get over it? I get sick for the first trimester, so I'm sick right now. I don't throw up, but I feel like I need to, pretty much........constantly.
Do we want a boy or girl? Boy
When are we due? August 1st
Is this a joke? No Laura it's not, I'm for real yo.
What does Masaru think? He's pretty pumped to have a brother. He's been very understanding with me being sick too. I'll say to him "Mum feels sick" and he says "It's because the baby is growing bidder and bidder and bidder and bidder mum" I think this pregnacy will be fun with Masaru as he's at that age where he can understand.
Does Masaru want a brother or sister? Brother
Dru's pregnant? No, you full retard he's not. He won't be on Oprah any time soon.
Is Dru a trans gender female? Nope, I've looked, he's not. No scars under his nipples and his unit is working great. (Sorry to the more sophisticated freinds out there, apparently I have a smart mouthed SIL who needs simple answers)
You know that guy who just had a baby is pregnant again? Yep
How am I pregnant? Sorry Holby, you're on your own with this one, apparently you must know though considering you and your wife have had one boy. If you need details though call me and I'll talk to you and your wife about it. ;)
Oh he was just kidding..................phew I was worried there for a second.
Is Dru a medical miricle or just sympathy stuff? Well he's pretty good looking and has a hot body, so yeah, I'd say he's a medical miricle.
Expecting a baby together but pregnant together? Alright Leslie, you got me Dru isn't pregnant. I'm glad you pointed that out cause I would've went through this 9 months wondering why Dru wasn't putting on any weight.
How was Utah? Great, good times, good fun, but just a little sick.

So there we are peeps. Hope that helped out a bit.
Thanks for all your comments and concerns and love. Dru and I are very excited, especially Dru since there was some concern there for a while about his gender and pregnancy status.

Out of sorts

Sorry it's been so long but I'm on holiday and loving every minute of it.
I know I need to post about Christmas, New Year and I will but for now I'll just post about how Dru and I are pregnant!